F. Scott Fitzgerald wrote:  Show me a hero and I’ll write you a tragedy.”

    In light of what’s happened in sports recently with Manny, A-Rod, David Oritz, Marion Jones and countless others, no truer words have ever been spoken.  But before your enthusiasm for sports gets smothered under the weight of syringes, roids and positive tests, let’s chat a little bit about sports-figure heroes.  I know a little about this subject.  I was a hero to millions of kids and teens.  I played Nitro on the original American Gladiators for seven years.  In our hey day we had tens of millions of viewers each week and in some markets out drew pro football. I understand what A-Rod, Manny Ramirez and others are going through.  As an athlete and entertainer you’re being consumed and swallowed by the beast of American Consumerism.  You’re a hero who the fans project their thrills, dreams and insatiable demands – and you’re willing to do anything to satisfy them – including taking steroids. 

    Back in the 90’s during the American Gladiators live tour I remember walking out onto the floor of Madison Square Garden and 15,000 fans slammed to their feet and chanted my name.  My heart pumped so hard, I could literally feel myself touch each and everyone of the fans.  I wasn’t “young and stupid” and “didn’t know” what I was taking.  I was intoxicated with the adulation and adoration and would’ve done anything to fulfill my obligation to entertain.  I would’ve ripped my heart out of my chest and held it out, still pulsating in my hands, if that’s what the fans demanded.

   But I also remember knowing deep inside I was giving pieces of my body away, paying for my success with a pound of flesh.  But this Faustian bargain isn’t something athletes want to deal with. We don’t want to know.  We’re in the business of denial and self-abuse.  Our body is a commodity, our mode of trade.  We’re used to pain.  We’re taught: “Don’t quit. Don’t give into the pain.”  So when we get the inclination something is wrong, we do not give in, we do not quit.  

    But I know times are different now.  Steroid use, once a dirty little secret confined to locker rooms, sports medicine clinics and gyms, has now erupted into a national controversy and spilled into our daily lives.  Their harmful side effects are no secret either.  But still right now I’m sure there’s still tens of millions kids and teenagers out there contemplating the steroid issue.  Do I need to take them?  Are they safe?  Can I make it if I don’t take steroids? 

    How do we educate and save the future generation of A-Rod and Manny, hopefuls?  The hardest part about this conversation is that everyone who takes steroid, will not become addicted, get horrible side effects or die.  That’s the simple truth.  But many will.  I know I did.

    I was a guy who always thought I could handle taking steroids.  But in truth, the drug handled me, easily and completely.  At my peak, I was six feet two, 260 pounds.  Muscles stretched and defined by red, white, and blue spandex.  I loomed as if I blocked out the sun.  That was everyone else’s perception of me.  But I was never big enough or strong enough for myself.  I reached a point where contentment and fulfillment were impossible.  I learned that steroids were a hopeless reach for happiness and could never fill what I was missing inside.

    And maybe that’s what I’m getting at here.  It’s not A-Rods, Bonds, Manny’s or Ortiz’s fault.  It’s not my fault.  It’s not your fault.  It’s our fault.  Everyone is culpable.  No one can look the other way.  We’ve become a nation obsessed with a winner take all mentality, where every effort is marked down at the end as a win or a loss, where second place means nothing.   What is it about the very fabric of us as a nation that’s led us here?  Why are we so intoxicated with winning?  I guess the real question is: What are we missing inside?

    I knew when I won, I was somebody.  When I didn’t, I was invisible.

    So how do we fix something that is broken at the very core or our existence?

    I can tell you what changed for me.

    I learned the business of building a life.  I learned to make my son, my family, and the bright shining smiles of my nieces and nephews more important than the roar of the crowd. I learned how to get love and adulation from those closest to me.  I learned how to fill what was missing inside.

    How important is this distinction?

    It means everything.

    I’ve been clean for over seven years, and finally feel like I’m walking toward a place I want to go. 

Be well,

Dan “Nitro” Clark

Gladiator Cover 3

 

Btw — one of the best protein powders I’ve tried is Sun Warrior protein.  It’s natural, raw and organic and has the highest assimilation rates of any protein on the market.  Here’s an interview I did with the owners of the company.  Sun Warrior protein interview.

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The Ugly Truth Party

Posted in Uncategorized on July 25th by Dan.

  Last night I went to a party thrown by my fabulous friend Karen Lutz who is one of the screenwriters and Exec Producers for this funny movie called "The Ugly Truth" starring Kathryn Heigl and Gerard Butler and man did it get Ugly!   Karen and her writing partner rented out this nightclub Bardot that is smack in the middle of Hollywood.  It was OPEN BAR with food!   That’s what I call a bash!!  And they picked up the tab for 250 people as we all got hammered and celebrated our friends’ success!!  I think it’s awesome — the way these two very successful women know how to party and celebrate.  So often we get caught up in achieving we forget to enjoy the rewards from all the damn work hard work we do.  So kudos and huge shout out to Karen and Kiwi and I hope their movie kills it at the box office this weekend! Check it out — the Ugly Truth has something for both the men and the women.  

Btw — I got Himbo-ed last night.  I ran into a girl I dated 10 years ago.  I said, "Hey! How are you?"  She replied, "Do I know you?"   I paused for a moment.  Thrown. (How could she not remember? It’s a crushing thought to think I was that unimpressive!)  Then I said her name… and told we "exchanged body fluids a few years back," then walked off and wept softly into my napkin for the rest of the night.  LOL.  Now that I know what it feels like — I’ve decided that whenever a woman walks up to me and simply says "hello,"  I’m just going to respond with, "I remember you.  We dated, right?"

Also a big shout out to my friend and go to producer  Janet Hill at KTLA Channel 5 in Los Angeles for giving the release of the Original American Gladiators DVD some love on the Friday morning show.  Thanks for the love Janet!

Be well, 

Dan "Nitro" Clark

danclark

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Cheers Tyra for winning the Emmy!!  Now if readers ever wonder what it’s like to be on the Tyra Banks Show, in this post I’ll take you through a step by step description of the process of getting on her show — from the initial phone call to hugging her goodbye after our segment.  I was on recently and love to give you the 411.

The first thing you need to know about Tyra is that she works her tail off and has a great, hard working staff. It’s her vision, but they make it happen.  A special shout-out to exec producer John Redmann.  The next thing you need to do is be ready and bring your "A" game ’cause it all happens fast. I got the call from Tyra’s staff asking me if I would be interested in coming on the show on a Friday to talk about my memoir "Gladiator – A True Story of ‘Roids, Rage and Redemption."  Then Saturday I did the pre-interview.  

Monday I’m on a plane from Los Angeles to New York. Tuesday I’m on the Tyra Banks show.  The reason the pre-interview you is because the want to make sure you’re lively and great on the phone — meaning you will make a great guest.  The pre-interview was new experience for me.  Most of the talk shows I’ve done were for the American Gladiators.  There have been numerous — from Good Morning American to the Tonight Show — and I simply showed up on set and talked about Gladiators — talked about being Nitro.  

Being on as an author was definitely new territory.  I knew I couldn’t go on and be that cocky-guy who lead with his fist — but I also wanted to be exciting, interesting with a touch of salaciousness.  The pre-interview went on for nearly 90 minutes.  Even though I knew I was going to be on the show, I was a tad bit nervous, thinking I was going to screw it up somehow.  I guess the biggest thing is being true to yourself and your message and not pushing or forcing to try and be something you’re not, so they’ll think you’re great. 

I arrived in New York late Monday night for my appearance the next day.  I won’t bore you with my nightly rituals, except to say — I called my girlfriend, told her I missed her, then drifted off to sleep.   My publicists and I arrived at the studio in the early afternoon and were immediately buffeted into a dressing room.   No sooner had I put my bag down, when a bouncy producer walked in and handed me my script and asked me if I wanted to run through it once.  Huh?  Remember that pre-interview?   Well, they take all of the good stuff, put it into a question answer format, and basically hand you an outline of the show.  This is what Tyra is going to ask you.  This is how you’re going to respond, or at least did in the pre-interview.  Hint- hint.  Wink-wink.  

Bouncy, cute producer tells me she’s going to be Tyra and I’m going to be me, and wants to run through it once to see how it plays. Alrighty, then.  We go through it once and I’m disappointed because all the questions are geared around sensationalizing the side-effects of steroids.   I’m more then disappointed, I’m disheartened.  Because I know my memoir goes miles deeper and at the heart of it, it’s about: identity, love, family, addiction and survivorship told through the prism of celebrity. I also know that to connect and really resonate with Tyra’s female audience I had to find a way to work in the "human" side of the story into my segments. I had to let her audience know this book was an emotional journey — about a little boy whose parents we’re divorced when he was 5 years old and who was crying inconsolably until a man told him "big boys don’t cry."   That boy took those words to heart and didn’t cry when he was ten years old — and his older brother die in his arms — then spent the rest of the life trying to become whole again, trying be human, trying to feel.

Yes, this journey involved drugs,women, celebrity — but I also knew even at the darkest points my humanity shined through in my life and on the page.  Suddenly a producer popped in — whisked me down the hallway to the stage area — all I can think about is how to get the story I want tell across while still satisfying the producer’s needs. Now, I’m standing behind a curtain at the back of the stage while they are doing my introduction and it’s really something.  "Most famous Gladiator, huge hunk, every women’s fantasy."  I feel myself swell up with pride until — the announcers says — "Who grew breast from steroids.  Welcome Dan Nitro Clark!"   The stage manager pulled back the curtain and tells me to "Go, Go!"  I stumbled on stage feeling awkward as hell, not sure whether to smile and wave, or hang my head down in shame and embarrassment.   I kinda did both.  I think.  You’ll have to watch my entrance and let me know. 

So, I’m sitting next to Tyra, still a little thrown by the introduction — being in front a live audience staring, by having three cameras targeted toward at me like canons.   But now, I’m more determined then ever to tell the story I want to tell and not get caught up in this whirlwind of sensationalism about steroids.  I make up my mind right then and there that no matter what she asks me — I’m going to answer her question then start talking about "human" aspect of the journey.  Tyra asks me the first question, "When did you start taking steroids?" I give her the one sentence answer and dive into, "But what I really want to talk about is how we stereotype boys and girls at a young age."  

I could see Tyra look at me a little funny.  I keep going and tell the story about my parents being divorced, being inconsolable, the words big boys don’t cry, and how it affected me.  I tell her about my brother dying in my arms, and how I didn’t cry.  I tell her about how I spent the rest of my life building this huge body, all to protect that kid inside.   And I’m talking FAST.  Really fast, just trying to get the story out.  And I’m aware that I’m talking hyper-fast which makes me even talk faster!  I keep thinking at any moment they are going to "Gong me" and stop shooting and tell me to get the hell back to the script.  As the words keep spilling out of my mouth, I see Tyra keep eyes shoot down to her script then back at me with a glare that says, "What the hell are you talking about?"   I now realize I’ve been talking non-stop for close to a few minutes when Tyra suddenly looks at me and says: "Oh my God, how did your brother die?"  Her question is sincere and her eyes are full of compassion.  I take a deep breath in and tell her the story. Then we took the interview from there moment by moment.  

Kudos to Tyra for letting me have that moment and being such a pro that she knew a better story when she heard it, and for trusting herself and me to go with it.   That being said, I haven’t seen the show as of writing this.  It airs today, Thursday the 16th of April. For all I know… they could introduce me "Nitro — the man who grew boobs" and cut the rest! As for the producers?  They all rock!  And we all slugged back margarita’s later that night in a little Mexican bar in the meat packing district.   And yes, I bought.  How could I not?  After all they told me it was one of the best segments of the year!  Let me know what you think after watching it. 

Be brilliant!

Dan "Nitro" Clark

 

Dan Register.jpg

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I had an interesting interchange with a young friend of mine about whether or not he should take steroids. I know a little about the subject being that I took them for over 20 years.  

I say he's young – young to me, but he's not a kid.  I believe he's in his late 20's.  Not that I'm old like father time.  Hell, I just had my 45 birthday… but I'm wise in years of experience.  I've seen a lot in my life.  

Well, this friend of mine — we'll call him "Rick" — has been asking me a lot about steroids.  He's obsessed with them and what he thinks they will do for him and how they will change his life.  Just recently he said, "I'd love to be able to bench 500 pounds and scream and throw it on the rack, like you did when you were Nitro on "American Gladiators."  

The kid's a smart kid… he read my memoir Gladiator – A True Story of Roids, Rage and Redemption a few times.  So, I'm stunned my stance against steroids isn't crystal clear him.

I have to say, it feels odd now to be admired for being a Hercules who hoisted up heavy weights.  But at the time it meant everything.  I realize now it means nothing.  But what's different?  What's changed? And how do I share this with my young friend?  The best I could come up with is:  

wish I would've spent more time building a life back when I was young — because eventually your body will fail you — it will grow old — but the life you build around will only continue to grow and blossom. 

I really hope he understands me.  It took me too many years to realize that: 

Steroids and drugs are a hopeless reach for happiness.  Because you'll never be big enough or strong enough or high enough to fill what is missing inside.  Eventually you'll have to learn the process of building a life, and realize that the honey, the reward, comes from putting your nose to the grindstone and walking toward a place you want to go.   

I dedicated my book to:

My son, my family, and that bright shining smile of nieces and nephews that became more important than the roar of the crowd.  

This distinction has made all the difference.   Even though he wasn't asking me for advice, I say this to my young friend: 

Build your life from the inside out.  Know that your enough.  And realize that where ever you go, there you will be. 

Be Brilliant!

Dan Clark

NitroEdited

BTW — I've been clean for over 6 years.  One of the best products that really helped me is this protein powder called Sun Warrior protein.  It's organic, raw and make with brown rice protein and has the highest assimilation on the market.  It's great stuff that is easy to digest and the best I've found period.

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One of the main things people ask me about American Gladiators is the "Where are they now?" question. They want to know what I (Dan Clark aka Nitro) and the other Gladiators are doing.

Well, recently I had the pleasure of going into Shout Factory studios with Raye Hollit (Zap) and Jim Starr (Laser) to do commentary for the release of American Gladiators Season One.

The three of us spent the better part of the day watching episodes, laughing our asses off, and reminiscing about the good times. It's hard to believe how fast time has gone. It seemed like it was just yesterday when we were sporting our spandex, mullets and attitudes.  

I encourage all to go and get the AMERICAN GLADIATORS SEASON 1 DVD – there's a "BUY NOW" button on my home page www.DanNitroClark.com  

I'm sure it will unearth a lot of great memories! 

Wish the USC Trojans luck this year.  Michael Horton (Gemini) son's both play football for them.  

Spoke to Malibu not too long ago.  He's still hanging in the biz.  Sabre (Lynne Williams) now works with his brother-in-law D.L. Hughley.  Ice (Lori Fettrick) is my bud on FB and Twitter.  She's killin' in the Real Estate Market in the San Fernando Valley. Jazz (Victoria Gay) lives in Houston – still doing great as strong and dedicated as ever to training. 

The next thing people want to know is "What I look like now?"  

It was a rough journey coming clean off steroids. 'Roids certainly did a number on my body, but over the last few years I've done countless hours or research and experimentation and discovered  a lot of great supplements and superfoods that have helped build my body back.  

I used to want to be the biggest, strongest guy in the gym.  Now, I'm content with being the "healthiest."  

This little distinction has made all the difference.

To satisfy those who are curious, here's a recent photo of me in Turks and Caicos at the Gansevoort hotel.

Turks and Caicos 2009

Be well!

Dan Clark

BTW — the BEST PROTEIN POWDER I've ever tried is Sun Warrior protein.  It's from brown rice and digest easily and the assimilation into the body is the highest on the market!!

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    I'm honored and blown away by the kind words "Running with Scissors" author Augusten Burroughs had to say about my book "Gladiator – A True Story of 'Roids, Rage and Redemption."

 

“Dan Clark possesses the emotional honesty, humility and depth together with the innate literary talent and stylistic sensibility to execute this memoir with stunning eloquence and power. His lean, muscular prose never wavers off course as it leads us through his unspeakable loss, overwhelming success and ultimately into a kind of acceptance and redemption. As readers, we are fortunate that not all talented writers march automatically through grad school and into publication; some first become comics and undertakers and whalers and American Gladiators.” 

                                                                            -AUGUSTEN BURROUGHS 

 

Growing up I always believed writing books was something "smart people" did.  Augusten is one of those "smart people."  If you haven't read Augusten's books yet, don't walk, run to the book store!  (Do people still go to the book store? Or is it Amazon only?)

 Either way, if you love a good memoir, his books are about as good as it gets.  Running with Scissors was also made into a film with the same name that starred Gwenyth Paltrow.  

Here's his website info:  Augusten.com  

Check him out. BTW — I don't consider myself one of the "smart people," just someone who is determined and someone who hasn't let the noise of other's opinions drown out what I know is possible. 

Be brilliant!

Dan "Nitro" Clark

 

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