Dan Nitro Clark

 F. Scott Fitzgerald wrote:  “Show me a hero and I’ll write you a tragedy.”

    In light of what’s happened in sports recently with Manny, A-Rod, David Oritz, Marion Jones and countless others, no truer words have ever been spoken.  But before your enthusiasm for sports gets smothered under the weight of syringes, roids and positive tests, let’s chat a little bit about sports-figure heroes.  I know a little about this subject.  I was a hero to millions of kids and teens.  I played Nitro on the original American Gladiators for seven years.  In our hey day we had tens of millions of viewers each week and in some markets out drew pro football. I understand what A-Rod, Manny Ramirez and others are going through.  As an athlete and entertainer you’re being consumed and swallowed by the beast of American Consumerism.  You’re a hero who the fans project their thrills, dreams and insatiable demands – and you’re willing to do anything to satisfy them – including taking steroids. 

    Back in the 90’s during the American Gladiators live tour I remember walking out onto the floor of Madison Square Garden and 15,000 fans slammed to their feet and chanted my name.  My heart pumped so hard, I could literally feel myself touch each and everyone of the fans.  I wasn’t “young and stupid” and “didn’t know” what I was taking.  I was intoxicated with the adulation and adoration and would’ve done anything to fulfill my obligation to entertain.  I would’ve ripped my heart out of my chest and held it out, still pulsating in my hands, if that’s what the fans demanded.

   But I also remember knowing deep inside I was giving pieces of my body away, paying for my success with a pound of flesh.  But this Faustian bargain isn’t something athletes want to deal with. We don’t want to know.  We’re in the business of denial and self-abuse.  Our body is a commodity, our mode of trade.  We’re used to pain.  We’re taught: “Don’t quit. Don’t give into the pain.”  So when we get the inclination something is wrong, we do not give in, we do not quit.  

    But I know times are different now.  Steroid use, once a dirty little secret confined to locker rooms, sports medicine clinics and gyms, has now erupted into a national controversy and spilled into our daily lives.  Their harmful side effects are no secret either.  But still right now I’m sure there’s still tens of millions kids and teenagers out there contemplating the steroid issue.  Do I need to take them?  Are they safe?  Can I make it if I don’t take steroids? 

    How do we educate and save the future generation of A-Rod and Manny, hopefuls?  The hardest part about this conversation is that everyone who takes steroid, will not become addicted, get horrible side effects or die.  That’s the simple truth.  But many will.  I know I did.

    I was a guy who always thought I could handle taking steroids.  But in truth, the drug handled me, easily and completely.  At my peak, I was six feet two, 260 pounds.  Muscles stretched and defined by red, white, and blue spandex.  I loomed as if I blocked out the sun.  That was everyone else’s perception of me.  But I was never big enough or strong enough for myself.  I reached a point where contentment and fulfillment were impossible.  I learned that steroids were a hopeless reach for happiness and could never fill what I was missing inside.

    And maybe that’s what I’m getting at here.  It’s not A-Rods, Bonds, Manny’s or Ortiz’s fault.  It’s not my fault.  It’s not your fault.  It’s our fault.  Everyone is culpable.  No one can look the other way.  We’ve become a nation obsessed with a winner take all mentality, where every effort is marked down at the end as a win or a loss, where second place means nothing.   What is it about the very fabric of us as a nation that’s led us here?  Why are we so intoxicated with winning?  I guess the real question is: What are we missing inside?

    I knew when I won, I was somebody.  When I didn’t, I was invisible.

    So how do we fix something that is broken at the very core or our existence?

    I can tell you what changed for me.

    I learned the business of building a life.  I learned to make my son, my family, and the bright shining smiles of my nieces and nephews more important than the roar of the crowd. I learned how to get love and adulation from those closest to me.  I learned how to fill what was missing inside.

    How important is this distinction?

    It means everything.

    I’ve been clean for over seven years, and finally feel like I’m walking toward a place I want to go. 

Be well,

Dan “Nitro” Clark

Btw — one of the best protein powders I’ve tried is Sun Warrior protein.  It’s natural, raw and organic and has the highest assimilation rates of any protein on the market.  Here’s an interview I did with the owners of the company.  Sun Warrior protein interview.

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